The Resilient Woman series

Courage Tenacity Persistence

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Hello, again my friends! Welcome back to The Resilient Woman series. If you need to be filled in click here.

If you are reading this then you’re certainly at the right place. Here you will find encouragement to press on no matter what the circumstance. This weeks guest possesses a unique artistic flava. One that peaks your curiosity yet is quite pleasing to the eye.

Meet Lena Dee

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Growing up in the Carribean, Lena comes from a small family. She has learned to face her challenges head-on and grow from them. Like many who experience life’s ups and downs, she has developed a resiliency that others will definitely relate to. Barely missing out on attending The University abroad might have opened a door to anxiety attacks and depression, but courage and a never stop pressing mindset encouraged her otherwise.
As a millennial, today she participates in life as we all do showing her might through word and her determination by accepting the challenges along the way to a Masters Degree. Read on as she shares her candid thoughts.
So Lenna…
TWH- What is your definition of a strong woman?
 
My idea of a strong woman is one that knows no bounds. She doesn’t take no for an answer and no matter what comes her way she does NOT give up. She possesses patience and endurance because no matter what comes her way, she doesn’t take a stumbling fall to mean she’s shattered and cannot rebuild herself. She finds strengths in her weaknesses and learns from experiences to grow. 
 
TWH- A resilient woman possesses these qualities. Explain.
 
(I hope I answer this correctly from my understanding of the question)
 
I think there is no one set of qualities a strong woman possesses but several, each varying from woman to woman. Few qualities may overlap between women but in looking at a female’s strength holistically, I do not believe you can isolate qualities to say that any as a singularity defines strength. Strength is a collection of qualities that change from woman to woman. One woman’s form of strength may not be found in another. The key goal, however, is striving to succeed in life, regardless of what that means to you. 
 
 
TWH-  Could you name a few situations that highlight or showcase the resilient women in action?
 
One I would say is the situation of single mothers. To the world, this is one person but to her child/children, she is the world. The odds aren’t always in the favor of single moms and to many, systems of society try to exploit their state of being alone or a sole parent as a weakness. Many times over, these moms are faced with obstacles that test their strength and capability to provide and nurture another individual. There’s no book telling you what to do but many people like to interject and tell them they’re doing it wrong. I think any single mom that puts her child or children at the top of her hierarchy and has the determination to keep pushing through for her little family is not just a resilient woman but a superhero. 
 
 
TWH- What barriers if any may a resilient woman encounter?
 
There are so many barriers resilient women face. From men telling them, they can’t perform their roles efficiently to other women judging them for their choices. Being resilient is not for the weak at heart. It doesn’t mean you will always come out on top for every battle but that you have the perseverance to keep fighting for an outcome that can lead you in the right direction to succeed. In life, there will ALWAYS be people and more “powerful” forces trying to deter you from your path to success. At the end of it all, it is your choice and willpower to generate a strong state of mind that will keep driving you forward. It is not easy, especially for those who may not have as much support as others, but where there is a will, there is a way.
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TWH- Is society recognizing the resilient women today and if so how?
 
Is society trying? Yes! Can more be done? Most definitely!
I feel like to some extent society recognizes a resilient woman but there is most certainly more to be done. I mean, look at the way we’ve been taught to socialize and have a majority of social institutions not built in the favor of women isn’t helping. There is still a lot of gender bias. Many eras have passed women fighting their hearts out and dying for equality but we will never be equal to men, nor should we want to be. I think females NEED to see themselves more as the forces to be reckoned with that they really are. I think we’ve lost many battles wanting equality instead of fairness. Fairness in a society that is very in the middle about the topic of females and our resilience. Society wants change to occur for females but still isn’t fully inclined to let it happen or to provide the building blocks for the change. Right now, females have fought to the point where the conversation is changing. More of our voices are being heard, especially on social media platforms, more movements are being recognized and are more inclusive of women from different socio-economic backgrounds and religions. I think the varying concepts of what a society is, can still create a division for women. I believe unity is the key across borders but obviously, that’s easier said than done. There are still many places around the world that aren’t as mainstream as certain parts of the Western Hemisphere (i.e USA, Canada, UK etc.) where there is still a very strong patriarchy that opposes women. Where young girls are indoctrinated to feel powerless and like the inferior being. In those types of places, I think females who are brave enough to endure those constraints, build a certain resilience that isn’t recognized enough by societies. We are more powerful than we think and the day more of us can access this power mentally and internalize it, we will be unstoppable.
Lol sorry, it’s so lengthy!
TWH, not a problem at all. Your thoughts are most welcomed.
TWH-  Who is your example of a strong woman? If more, its ok to share that too.
I don’t necessarily have one person in mind but several. I think women from all backgrounds who have the strength to get up daily and face this world and to continue to claw their way through whatever comes at them, are magnificently strong. Strength can’t be accredited to one or a few but to many. Many women who get knocked down ten times over continuously but get back up eleven. Not every woman has the strength to keep fighting, many lose the battle daily and eventually the war. They may not be deceased but they become mental slaves to their circumstances or the oppression they face. The day you become mentally enslaved to someone’s false perception of you can be your darkest day yet. Until you redeem the strength to someday claw your way to the light, those shackles will not break free. With that being said, my example of strong women are the women who provide for and raise their families, the everyday woman that keeps going after what she needs to succeed and survive, the women who have been abused and tortured but fight to survive, the women that speak up on the goodness of change,  and most importantly ALL females who get up daily and try. 
 
 
TWH-  Do you feel there are limits to being a strong woman?
 
In life, everything has its form of kryptonite. Everything and everyone has a breaking point but it is whether you can recover from it or not. There exist certain weaknesses that can exhaust you but nothing lasts forever right? Exactly! There comes a moment where you find your strength in that weakness that can give you the sight you need to change courses and move forward. A strong woman may encounter several breaking points in her life that eventually builds her tolerance and propels her in her journey. Some obstacles force us to see things we don’t always want to accept but eventually learn to in order to grow as a person. Sometimes you have to lose a few battles before you can win the war. A strong woman is unstoppable but does not possess perpetual invincibility. 
 
TWH- If you could help guide someone to being a strong woman how would you help them?
I’d help them by sharing my experiences, I believe you should always want to be a student in the way of life but that doesn’t mean you can’t pass on the knowledge you’ve gathered. Every individual can go through different struggles but be observant and willing to learn from others can definitely help in most aspects. Your stories may differ but there should always be one vital commonality, never giving up. My best form of guidance is the advice to learn to love and believe in yourself. Self-love is not selfishness and it is more important than we think. Understanding that no one can give you strength but yourself and unlocking that power is the biggest form of personal development that will help you persevere.

Wow!  Thanks, Lena for sharing your thoughts.  I can see that you are definitely on a mission. Appreciate your input as always.

Thank you so much for this interview Al and having a chance to voice my opinion on such a subject matter. 

Well friends, Can you feel it? Can you feel the passion within to motivate? I did! If you desire to share her passion below is where you can connect. She has a unique presence on social media in which one must definitely connect with and have in life’s tool bag of empowerment and courage.

PR email: info@lenadeexo.com

Twitter @lenadeexo

Instagram @_lenadee

Pinterest @lena_dee

Blog/website https://lenadeexo.com

Thanks so much for the read! My hope is that you have been educated and encouraged to go on. Stay tuned for the next weeks guest.

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The Resilient Woman series

Courage Tenacity Persistence

Hello and welcome back to this week’s posts on the Resilient Woman. I hope you have enjoyed the candid responses from the ladies who so graciously accepted doing the interview.

This weeks guest can be described in a word; Determined.

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Growing up, Teika Towns was exposed to much; love, separation, trust, alcoholism, partying, and determination. Although this was the case, faith helped her to overcome paths to destruction and guide her to where she is today. Her story, for many, is a common one and another great example of an individual not allowing circumstances to defeat them in life. She has developed a caring for others approach in this life that she undoubtedly has learned from past experiences.

Take a listen as she shares a few personal points that will be sure to hit home with others.

So Teika, welcome! What are your initial thoughts?

First off, I want to say thank you for allowing me the opportunity to participate and thank you for thinking of me!  When you first asked me to be involved, I wasn’t really sure of what I was going to say or even, really, what it means to be a strong or resilient woman. Most of my experience has just been based on survival. But as I had time to think and reflect, please see my answers below.

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TWH-What is your definition of a strong woman?

My definition of a strong woman is a woman that is not defined by the strength of the man she may be with. A strong woman knows how to carry herself, take care of her family and take care of others. A strong woman may not always have her looks together or her appearance together, which can be misconstrued as a weakened state, however, to me, it just means that she is taking care of business and will do what is necessary to make sure the needs of her family and others are met.

TWH- A resilient woman possesses these qualities. Explain. 

A resilient woman possesses the following qualities: loyalty: loyal to her family, loyal to her job, her church, and most of all, loyal to GOD. GOD most certainly needs to play the role in a resilient woman because He is where her strength comes from.

Trust: A resilient woman can be trusted.  When she displays her loyalty, those who spend any time around her can be assured that trust is the basis of her very foundation.

Bounce back: A resilient woman bounces back.  I have been in a few situations where I felt like I was going to be taken down by the situation. I was married to a man for almost 4 years and we were only together for 19 months of those 4 years. Long enough to have 2 children. I felt like he thought I was young and could run my life, and I let him do it for a while to keep what I thought was “peace”. During that time period, I let myself go for a while, but I always made sure my daughter was well dressed (I didn’t have my son until after we parted ways). My mom would always notice that my clothes would be a little tattered or I may have had stains from carrying for my daughter on them. At the time, I just didn’t care; any chance I could get, I wanted to get out of the house and away from him. But the LORD dealt kindly with me and gave me my Bounce Back! I can remember when I first left him, one of the sister’s at the church said to me, in my face, “When the LORD delivers you from Egypt, you don’t go back!” I truly believe GOD used her to tell me to only look forward!!

TWH- Could you name a few situations that highlight or showcase the resilient women in action? 

My experience is being a single mother. I had the best example of my own mother though. I would always say that if I could be half the woman and mother that she was and is, I would be all the better for it! I waited until my kids were almost out of high school to go to college. In all honesty, the only reason why I went back to school was because in 2007, when my manager, Pat Kendrick (MeeMaw), put in my review that I should go to school, I wanted to meet that goal and challenge for my job, and at the time that was the only reason. I started school in January 2008, and finished with my MBA in May 2014; all while working full-time, taking care of my kids and home, and meeting my responsibilities at church and for the LORD. I finally had to realize that was a door HE opened! My GPA ended up being nearly a 3.7 all while maintaining life! I’d have to say that was one of my most greatest showcases of being a resilient woman. I wanted to also be an example to my kids, and other young men and women at church that they can do ANYTHING!! I also re-married during that six-year period, which was a HUGE adjustment for me and my children, because up until my husband came along, we were all we had so to speak. Sure my parents and family and church family were there, but when it came down to the nitty-gritty, it was just me and my kids!

TWH- What barriers if any may the resilient women encounter? 

Some barriers a resilient woman may face could be social and economic limits. But I believe this to be from man’s point of view. Those barriers are there, but it only goes to show that we must rely on GOD through those barriers. That’s also what makes us resilient, facing those barriers, but still believing we can succeed.

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TWH- Is society recognizing the resilient women today and if so how? 

I would have to say that society is starting to recognize the resilient woman! Look at Michelle Obama. She had to endure much in her role as FLOTUS. With all she and POTUS had to face during their tenure in the White House, I can remember in one of her speeches when she said: “When they go low, we go high!” That spoke volumes! A simple statement that poignantly says that society will try and pull a person (in many instances, women) down. And some will succumb to society, but then for the rest of us, no matter what we face, always go high!

TWH- Who is your example of a strong woman? If more, its ok to share that too. 

My example of a strong woman, is without a doubt, my MAMA!! She is the strongest woman I know! My life sorta puddled in her footsteps with raising two children, working a full-time job, AND going to school full-time, as a single mom. If she struggled, and I know she did, she never let my sister and me see it! She was and is still my hero! If I could choose another, it would be my godmother, Tracey Posey! She too has endured so much. Not always with grace, but because of the mercy of the LORD and her persistence to want to do right by GOD. She is still a work in progress, but I appreciate the LORD for her being so candid with anyone she talks to!

TWH- Do you feel there are limits to being a strong woman? 

I do not feel there are any limits to being a strong woman. It is a personal choice. I will say that strength does lie in numbers.  We must surround ourselves with other strong women, but at the same time, be there for that young woman, and even older women, who are struggling. We need to use our strength to build each other up. Most times, it isn’t a man who is belittling a woman, but it is other women, belittling other women!

TWH- If you could help guide someone to being a strong woman how would you help them? 

I would have to say the same as #7.

Quite truthful and gut-wrenching responses Teika. Thanks so much for participating and sharing your thoughts.

Well everyone, again we have another courageous lady that quite frankly is and has handled business. Hopefully, you have not only been educated in some way but encouraged to press on. Thanks for the read!

Stay tuned for next weeks guest.

 

 

 

The Resilient Woman series

Courage, Tenacity, Persistence

Hi friends! Welcome back to the “Resilient Woman” series. Glad you stopped by.

This weeks guest is Andrea Joy and boy is she an extension of her name. Andrea is such a delight to converse with that one must definitely have her in their tool bag of life. Her passion revolves around finances so who isn’t affected here. I am so grateful she participated in the series. Read on as she shares her candid thoughts on the Resilient Woman.

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Andrea, tell us about yourself.

My name is Andrea Joy, and my goal with my blog www.savingjoyfully.com is to help you make more and save more money every month. My website shares some of the ways I have learned over the years to stretch my budget every month. My biggest interests are saving money, being more frugal, and learning new ways to make extra money on the side.

That is awesome! Well said. Everyone is impacted by money so it only stands to reason the need to be wise and frugal with it.

So Andrea, in today’s society when it is mentioned concerning the resilient or strong woman, to you…

TWH- What is your definition of a strong woman?

A strong woman is a woman that no matter what life throws at her she is able to rise above it. A strong woman may go through an abusive relationship, custody battle, divorce, loss of a child or spouse, loss of a job and still give it all she has each time. A strong woman must learn to recognize her feelings and accept them, but also learn to think and make choices based on what is best for her life not just based on her feelings.

TWH- A resilient woman possesses these qualities. Explain. 

Hard working, she is willing to work through all that life throws at her and yet never give up. She is always determined to make it no matter what situation she is dealing with and is always choosing to rise above the hard times. She is honest about her feelings and about where she has come from throughout every area of her life and her relationships. She displays courage as she accepts what she has been through and often deals with the hardest things a person can ever have to deal with. Despite everything she goes through she does all of this in a way that she can share her triumphs and inspire others.

TWH- Could you name a few situations that highlight or showcase the resilient women in action?

Having a family situation with my siblings who had been removed from their home and the opportunity for me to decide whether to step in and become their caregivers. I knew the girls, who were both teenagers at that time, needed my help and support. At that time there was no question in my mind what had to be done, I had to let them live with me. The situation was very hard and despite the emotional roller coaster and the family that would choose to turn on me for my choices, I knew what I had to do. I will never regret this even though it changed my own life entirely and broke all of our hearts at times throughout the process.

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TWH- What barriers if any may the resilient women encounter?

People who do not understand her choices, and her struggles. Many people will hurt her along the way and yet she will always find a way to rise above the challenges and pain life throws her way. The resilient woman will have to be strong in situations that hurt very badly and often make her question her own strength. This same woman will discover what she is really made of through these choices and will continue to pursue the right path for her life with dignity and persistence.

TWH- Is society recognizing the resilient women today and if so how?

Society does not always recognize the resilient woman because we look just like any other woman. Women are not always seen as strong and capable of great things. Depending on the strength and courage a woman possesses in the difficult times in her life she can stand out and shine in her life as she lives this life of courage. This is how you can recognize a resilient woman, she will be the one that despite everything life throws at her she is still working towards her goals and inspiring others.

TWH- Who is your example of a strong woman? If more, it’s ok to share that too.

My Grandmother was always my best example of a resilient woman. She changed my entire view of women and made me the woman that I am today. She was a child who watched her mother die of a terrible illness while her father left her and her brother to raise themselves. She then moved in with her aunt and uncle who raised her and her brother until she graduated. She married young and married an abusive man and then was forced to raise her own 4 children alone for years until she met her second husband. My Grandmother was the most kind and caring woman that anyone would ever meet. My family used to say that she would give you the shirt off her back and they honestly were right. She was so loving and cared so much about others and if it were not for my Grandmother’s love in my life I would have been a very different woman today.

TWH- Do you feel there are limits to being a strong woman?

Everyone has their limits and the strongest women usually have someone that they can talk to and confide in. They recognize that they cannot always do everything alone and they need the love and support of others in their lives. A strong woman will ask someone she can trust for help when necessary.

TWH- If you could help guide someone to being a strong woman how would you help them?

I would say recognize that you are strong and capable because of who you are not because of anything else. I would tell her that whatever you put your mind to, and work hard towards is possible. I would encourage her to keep believing and working towards her dreams. We all need the help of others along the way in our lives so I would encourage her to surround herself with others who support and inspire her to be the best version of herself.

Thanks so much, Andrea for participating and sharing your thoughts. It has been my pleasure to provide a platform for us all to be enlightened as to today’s strong and woman.

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Well, there you have it, folks. I told you she was a delight. Stay connected with her on these social media outlets. Till next post, stay upbeat and encouraged!

Twitter https://twitter.com/savingjoyfully

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrea-joy-6271b115b

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/savingjoyfully/

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/savingjoyfullycom-973149492832126/

Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/savingjoyfully/overview/

Blog/website http://savingjoyfully.com/

How to Stay​ Upbeat

The waves of life can cause you to be tossed to and fro. These tips will help smooth the ride

Howdy! How are you this week? I am good. I can’t complain.

I have learned this through life’s ups and downs to stay even-keeled.  Not to get too excited or too down about any circumstance. Sure, its good to recognize the circumstance and pay some emotion to it but not to get so involved as to lose stability.

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That being said I want to share with you a few tips I believe will help you stay upbeat through the waves of life. For me, these tips are likened to a stabilizer bar on a vehicle which assists the vehicle to maintain sure contact with the road. As you know, this helps keep the car on the road and handle disturbances such as potholes and other obstructions.

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Just as you keep identification information on you keep these in your pocket too. Lol.

Keep in your pocket

  1. Good friends– A good friend is a jewel that will lend an ear as well as keep you in check when needed. He or she will provide the encouragement when needed or the guidance to get you through a circumstance.
  2. A Spiritual leader– This life is kind of a culmination of two worlds. One is the physical and the other is spiritual. The physical is what we naturally see with the eye and revolves around our five senses. The spiritual is what we cannot see with the physical eye but revolves around faith and morality. Connecting with someone who has devoted themselves to receiving and teaching these principles could be a valuable resource.woman-690118__480
  3. The Professional- Our society has become a world of many disciplines. Financial wizards, medical students, automobile technicians, fitness gurus, travel explorers, food creators, technology experts, and blog professionals. This being the case, one has to connect with a professional to get the scoop on how things really work in that world. Sure you can possibly do your self but eventually, time management will have to be dealt with for you to effectively promote and function.
  4. Engagement– Socializing with others is a must in a world of others. Just think if you really wanted things to happen for you all the time where you are king or queen it would be a world of only “You” and “Lonely”. I don’t think we really want what is desired. Interacting with others is much like interacting with nature. Either is alive in its own being and rely on the air to breathe. The connection with others can actually be mentally therapeutic if mixed with a bit of humility. It can do wonders for social maturity.

 

Well, I hope you find these useful. They are not a complete do it all list but tips that may help you in a pinch.

Much love to you and success in all you do. For more useful life encouraging tips and ideas connect with me on Instagram TV and Pinterest. I would love your company.

 

 

Credits: Pixabay Images